Ethical sex—a short guideline in 2014
1. Consent. Both partners (or more partners) must come to having sex of their own free will, without pressure, alcohol, or domination from a form of power of currency. It must be from the sexual goodness, lust, desire, thirst, needs, love, excitement all their own.
2. Communication. All persons need to communicate that the sexual encounter is happening, taking place, and it is of their own choice and desire, from their own freedom. Neglect is not an option. The sexual experience needs to be open and understood between the sexual partners, their significant others, and the sexual others. All partners need to seek “premiso” (permission, approval, check-in) first with their sexual-significant other. This avoids drama and ill will poisoning the sex.
3. Self-Realness. All persons in sexual act need to communicate any restrictions, fears, standards, and health. This means disclosing what you do not want to do, what you do want to do, what is okay, what is not okay, and what, if any, STI one may or does have. Disclosing infection status is very important for trust, and allows all players to make their own choices.
4. Risk Reduction & Safety. All sex should NOT be done with recklessness. All sex has a certain amount of risk medically, emotionally, socially, physically, mentally, economically, and spiritually. Using sexual protective tools (condoms, IUD, PrEP etc) is important and should always be used. However, to reduce risk, if protective tools are not used, that choice must be made mutually and of truth, trust, understanding, and with foresight of consequences.